Forums

Welcome to Penny Haynes Life Patterns Ministry › Forums

This forum is for members only. Members need to login.

    • Forum
    • Topics
    • Posts
    • Freshness
    • Brokenness
      Forum of course "Brokenness"
    • 0
    • 0
    • No Topics

    • Make New Friends (YOU MUST READ THE RULES)
      This forum is where we re-learn how to build relationships with people again, and find new friends.  Many of our members have been isolated for so long that their friendship skills are somewhat rusty. So this is the place to practice learning how to make new friends and keep them.

      RULES: 

      1. You cannot talk about your problems in here.  Many of our members have been so focused on what is wrong in their life, they have trouble having conversations about anything else.  They have created a habit of talking about what is wrong in their life and how bad life is. In some cases, they have no hobbies, don't have a job, and have given up on their dreams. That leaves them with very little left to talk about.  The truth is that people who want new friends are not looking for people who are predominantly negative and have nothing positive or fun to say.   Save talking about your problems with your counselor, in the forums that are intended for discussion of your problems, or just a select few people who want to discuss that with you.
      2. You must talk about something upbeat, pleasant or fun. It can be a joke, a link to a funny video, your favorite food, something funny that happened to you, discussion about a hobby, or a praise report. Talk about anything that will enhance other people's lives and give you a way to connect with others who share your likes and sense of humor. If you don't have a hobby, ask others about theirs and start doing a hobby, so you have something to talk about.  People who want new friends are looking for people who will make them feel happier after being around them, and who make them feel better about themselves.
      3. Ask people questions about themselves. The truth is that people love to talk about themselves, so give them that opportunity.  Where did they come from? How many siblings do they have? What is their favorite food or hobby or tv show?  Keep the questions positive. The goal is to show interest, be a good listener, make them feel important and accepted, and feel better than before they had a conversation with you.  Make yourself the type of friend that people look forward to talking to.
      4. "Friend" people you would like to invite to be your friend. Once you find someone that appears to have common interests and would enhance your life, ask them to friend you on this site and so you can start a private conversation with them.  Remember the rules of this forum and apply them to your private conversations UNLESS they say they would like to talk about problems and negative things.  Ask permission to discuss negative issue before jumping into them, and make sure you talk about other positive things as well.
      5. THIS IS IMPORTANT: Not everyone may feel a connection to you, despite you feeling a connection with them.  You must accept this as a REDIRECTION, not a REJECTION.  There is a reason that the person is not connecting with you, and that reason is inside of THEM.  Consider their not friending you as a REDIRECTION by God. It is Him telling you that this is not the best person for you, despite your desire to be friends with them. We have to trust that God knows best, and we don't want just ANY friends, we want the RIGHT friends.  Just move on to someone else.
      6. If someone is rude or ugly, report them to me by messaging me at @pennyshaynes or use the Contact Penny form. That being said, remember that just about everybody who comes to this forum is out of practice having friends.  Give them the forgiveness you would want, and give them the benefit of the doubt that they are having a bad day and that it is about them and not you.  Give everyone at least 2 chances before you decide they are not the friend for you.
    • 1
    • 7
    • 6 months, 2 weeks ago

       pennyshaynes

  •